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Weddings, Reunions, Dental vists, and SHAKE UPS!

So you may have noticed someone has been missing a lot lately. You may have even noticed when he goes missing he doesn’t always explain why. Well…yeah no real explanation, sorry for that.

 

In other news I have been gone meeting old friends, getting massive dental work, and being best man in a wedding. Shout out to Superfans Chris and Ania Moncrief(aka Superman and Lois Lane) who celebrated their love in the classiest of weddings this past weekend.

 

You crashed both the wrong and the right wedding.

You crashed both the wrong and the right wedding.

But that Shakeup word is here again for good reason. 

 

Things are about to get interesting. Not only has WDDIJ been dealing with the …well Hilarious nature of advertising negotiations, but as you may have noticed we’ve lost a few authors. These things are not points to worry over. Trust me. In fact, the very way you view WDDIJ is about to change for the better.

 

In a short explanation, we’re doing an overhaul.

Why?

Because at 5500 views, we are little less than halfway to the year two viewership goal, and its only been 3 months.

In short, I’ve been short sighted.

 

To remedy that, I had to get to work.

And believe you me, the work is paying off.

Launching this fall is our interview series “Imperial Dreams”

Launching sooner rather than later this summer is a new format to the website

And Look for some shake ups in the staff as well.

Nothing drastic folks, but we want you to have a great experience.

And we want you to come to us for more of your daily content.

SO we need to be a place you want to come to.

And since I’ve been slacking on that. It is time to pick up the pace.

Of course I could tell you so much more, but as you know…

WORDS DON’T DO IT JUSTICE!

– THE Ruthless Wonder

Ruthless On Relationships: Viva La Bad Girls

Really? Another Ruthless On Relationships?

I know, I know, by the end of this I will have done 2 straight relationship posts and I said I wouldn’t go so heavy into them. 2 times is not a habit or routine practice people, calm it down. Besides I’m going to give a few people hope today…while shyte-ing on a segment of the population at the same time, but did you really expect otherwise from me? So let’s get right in to it. “I hate good girls.”

And I love bad girls like a fat kid loves cake…okay not really

Now there is a reason for this and I’m going to detail it, but for those of you who didn’t write me off based on that statement I want this to sink in. I am a professional, 31 year old, black, man living near the Kansas and Missouri Border in the very heart of the midwest in a major city and I hate good girls. Now don’t try to parse that statement, if you want to use good women it still applies. I’m not using girl as a denigration of the modern female, or as misogynist terminology to make the notion that women are less than me. It isn’t some reference to young girls in a pedophilic sense(As some know I have more than a thing for older women). I hate good girls/women.

Now that we’ve turned off the low intellect readers let’s get to the explanation. Because as you already knew, there is one. My dating history and my relationship history is a horror show at points. Pre-2006 revolution there is a stoic sarcastic deeply intellectual guy who let every woman who he was in a relationship with bash at his public persona in private. He looks insanely submissive by comparison. Pre-2000 high school it is so much worse I call it the darkest time. While I was and still am, very dominate in public, privately I was so unsure of myself that I clearly looked like prey for psychologically dangerous women, and they nearly ate young not-yet Ruthless Wonder alive.

But this is not really about the past versions of me. I’ve dated more good girls than bad girls until about 2007 and the far more the opposite since then. Why? Well for the same reason I hate good girls, perception and treatment. Since 06 I really have embraced the Ruthlessness I long tried to hold down. It wasn’t that I haven’t always been this way, it was that I was denying I was this way for everyone else’s benefit. And while often that made me seem cold and detached, it was better than to be thought that than a ruthless arrogant prick with a superiority complex…or so I thought. The last 2 good girls I have dated were great women. I would, if I were not this me writing this right now, attempt to date them again. The most recent more than the one before, but I think even she knows that. I find myself saying the same about them both though. The thing that is the core of my issues with good girls. You cannot accept me.

Here’s what I mean. Both of these women were for the time we dated cool with the majority of me. Public persona at 11 private at 5 or 6, hey let’s actually watch this cool movie on my set up(this deal only applies to movie one ladies, if there is a second…all bets are off). They were okay with some of my quirky nerdy habits. Neither one watched any anime with me, but they weren’t ridiculing me for watching it and I thank them. They could deal with knowing I’m a writer beyond my political and law interests so I may be in the middle of a poem or story and get all odd. But each one had some thing they just couldn’t roll with. Hell, one straight said that we couldn’t get more serious if I couldn’t turn down, well…THIS. Being RW(though this was before I had the name) was her issue. I wasn’t a horrible person according to her because she could see how I was when it was just me and her, but outside that was a problem.

My response(In my head cause I’m not stupid)? Meh. When things ended with each, and not too long after this point was the end basically both times. I left those situations each time thinking I had become a bad guy. That I was in serious need of change because I was a horrible person. Doubt was everywhere. But each time I found myself in what anyone would call a bad idea rebound type of relationship or 4. Since I’ve come home to KC and truly enjoyed single life for the last year and a half I’ve had time to really look back at things though, and noticed something. While the bad for me girls usually ended up in really short things, or never getting super serious, or cataclysmically bad ends(I’ll save those stories for another time), until that happened they worked. For them I was the good guy. They valued everything differently. And it isn’t like I went from fellow law students, professors, and doctors to strippers, waitresses, and instagram models. Just if you knew both women you’d call one the good girl, and one clearly the bad girl.

And so I have grown a hate for the “good girl” not the women themselves, but the attitude and style of the good girl. Because while I am Ruthless as I wanna be, I’m a Gent. I’m a black overweight James Bond…wait that’s too far. I’m just…an acquired taste, yeah I like that better. And so the bad idea relationships seem to be perfect for the time they happen. the bad girl calling me her good guy is probably the best relief from the stress of the day. But it is because they aren’t looking for everything wrong with me(which I admit there is a lot), and instead looking for what’s right. I’m not saying that every guy needs to head out and find some bad idea starting point in a bar, club, facebook group, or vacation and start his search for a girlfriend there. I’m saying for me, well as much as I want to date, get serious with, and maybe one day allow myself to be complete(Sorry Tyler Durden) with a good girl who doesn’t have the issues that basically each bad girl did, the good girls are just not an option. I’m too bad for them, but not too good for their counterparts. So I’ll just keep pulling out chairs, opening doors, and respectfully treating bad girls right. Of course maybe one will go good and I can stop looking, but maybe the opposite will happen as well. For now Wale said it best, “The bad girls ain’t no good, and the good girls ain’t no fun.”

– THE Ruthless Wonder

Once more with feeling

You folks must forgive me. Today will be super short compared to my usual posts, and it is quite self-indulgent. Next week I’ll be taking the bar exam. Now before you start declaring I’ll pass and trying to give me well wishes let me say something. This is not something to turn on the fake emotion for. Me and everyone else who are taking the bar next week, know horrifying facts about the exam. We also have been hibernating in various undisclosed locations, and congregating in various school classrooms prepping for this. While we appreciate the positive thinking it sounds more condescending than you can imagine. See the borderline masochist nature of studying for this test has changed us.

People often joke that lawyers are heartless, ruthless, money making douchebags who sold their humanity for success. Save the douchebag and humanity sold part you’re right. And this is what does it, this test will turn us into who you hate until you have to call on our services. Many well prepared people fail this thing, HARD, and we know these people. Some of us(not me) are these people. Support your law student about to walk into the gates of hell with something they need. New movies, tasty meals and beverages, gas for driving down to the exam location, plan a return party,  help them get a gig. Saying “I know you got this” or worse “I’d wish you good luck, but you don’t need it.” is as helpful as a punch in the face. We do need good luck. In some cases that seems to be the only thing that lets some of us pass while others fail.

Now that I’m done with that bit, let’s talk about the subject for today. HAHA I’m kidding. I did have a topic for today. Heck I have one for next week. But will I be posting them? No, no I won’t. It would start like normal and turn into some complexly worded bar question. This post is because I don’t want to leave you hanging. I’ll be back on or after August 1st. The Bar Exam is July 30th and 31st. You guys take care and read Rufus’ stuff. Maybe I can even convince Ronin to come out of hiding. See you soon. Hug a law student, especially if they are studying for the bar. And I’m off for a while.

-THE Ruthless Wonder

Entertainment and You

Entertainment and You

Is entertainment a form of control used to keep us dumb? First let me say ‘get that tone out of your voice’. This is not a conspiracy theory that I’m stating here, though really i could see how it would all tie into the evil plot used by those shadow organizations to keep the masses in line. No what i’m suggesting is something simpler, but the meaning carries the same weight, if not heavier. Take a list of your favorite TV shows, the ones that you watch faithfully. The ones that you record, watch on NETFLIX, HULU and random streams all across the net. Now add up the ‘time’. You’d be surprised how much of your ‘time’ (if your like some people i know) is being wasted on programs that hold absolutely no real significant meaning in your life.

Everyday i boot up a game and play it for a couple of hours. None of these games have taught me much of anything. The argument for hand eye coordination might be valid, but there have to be more physically demanding ways to improve such a thing without slouching on a couch yelling at  people over a tiny microphone. But still i do it. Still i sit and play my games, marveling at the story, the graphics and maybe even the gameplay when i find something interesting enough. But that does not change my opinion of this subject, out entertainment comes at a heavier price than money.

Perhaps i am being too harsh on such things, maybe just a little too tightly wound for my own good so I’ll elaborate my opinion.

Bioshock. Now there was a game worth its salt. The story was solid, the gameplay had a small but potent twist on first person shooters and the world was vibrant enough to such you in with wonderfully dark character themes. I would dare say that out of all the games i can remember playing; Bioshock was by far one of the best when it came to story….well at least with FPS types. But what did i get out of the disc? Have i gained any knowledge that would benefit me? I didn’t burn enough calories to warrant sitting on my but for a good six hours. I didn’t earn any sort of real achievements  (XBOX Achievements don’t count). The sense of accomplishment was minimal, it wasn’t like i did something that made me better than before, nor was it a task rumored to be impossible. Infact, the whole point of playing the game, of making the game, is so that you can hear/experience the story. Failure in that regard will never be the end result unless you simply give up. Could you imagine the game with no checkpoints, no do overs, and no redemption feature? The chances of success would be so small that only a few would reach the goal, and that my friend would not do for the companies.

So here are the pros of playing and beating Bioshock, at least the pros that carry over into the real world. You witnessed a stimulating story that sparked a small part of your creativity, and now have been introduced into a concept you might not have ever thought possible before. Pro, you’re problem solving skills are still sharp. Nothing else matters. Not the difficulty (unless it effects the ending in a drastic way), not the completion rate(again unless it effects the story), and definitely not the in game achievements. So with three pros we naturally move onto the cons.

Now i can’t say that these cons are the same for everyone, that truly depends on you (just like the pros i suppose) but this is based off of me, so I’ll just use my own list. Con, i just gained excess fat from not burning the calories necessary for the food and drink I’ve consumed. Con, my eyes are just that much more stressed from staring into a screen for a prolonged period of time. Con, i gained no relevant knowledge that will serve me well in my day to day situations. Con, i believe that I’ve simply wasted what is perceived as time.

There could be more cons, and arguably more pros, but i don’t believe the pros will ever outweigh the cons. Sometimes, i understand, entertainment is needed in order to deal with the stress of life. Perhaps the true enemy here is over indulgence, a trait it seems most Americans share. If we limited the time we took to play around in our hobbies or stress reducers we could more than likely live with a better sense of balance. Like all things it seems, balance is the key to true happiness. Take some time and think about it, yea?

Weekend with Ruthless: Sports, Suits, Stupid Decisions, and Saldana

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There is a TV documentary that came out not so long ago that I love. Like I love watching myself as played by Gabriel Macht on Suits. I love it because of the wake-up call I fervently hope and pray it caused athletes, entertainers, and some friends and relatives of mine to have. That documentary is the ESPN 30 for 30 series entry “Broke,” and it can change lives. So when I first got a good look at Broke, I, like I’m sure most people who have seen it had some complex emotions. On the one hand the image of Andre Rison trying to sing as they talk about the money he owed for the record label he started was funny. And because as a Chiefs fan I remember when he was our friendly neighborhood Spiderman. But I also felt anger. And let me expound on that.

I didn’t hate Bad Moon Rison for blowing his money on that equipment, or for the other money he had wasted, or for leaving the woman he had an argument with inside his house so she could burn it up. [Sidenote: R.I.P. Lisa “Left Eye” Lopes, we could use her in rap game right now.] No. I was mad because no one around him had any courage to tell him to do otherwise. No one was handling his affairs. No one was being the buffer zone between his agent and his wallet. And most certainly for a lot of that time no one had his back in legal matters. Now this post isn’t about to turn into “Why you need to hire my firm.” I’m not done with law school yet number one. And number two, we didn’t start this blog for job opportunities.

My issue with Rison and everyone else who is or was at times as deep in debt as I am with these law school loans was that despite their notoriety they didn’t get just one person to go to work vetting the people who handled things. You trust your agent because he’s your agent. Okay fine, but your agent shouldn’t handle your DUI case, or your businesses, or any of the matters that do not deal with negotiating with teams, the league, the player association, or your sponsors/endorsements. And on that last one your lawyer(who again should be someone else), should make sure any deal the agent does is actually doing what he is telling you.

Trust and loyalty is demanded in the blah blah blah, yeah I hear you. But the reality is once you hit a certain point in any arena, legal or not so much, you need someone making sure your mind isn’t too focused on thinking “I’M SO FREAKING AWESOME!!” to make the right decisions on the people around you. So while watching Broke, I see all of this at its most extreme. Froyo shops, car washes, paying the mortgages of  6 different people some friends, some family. Curt Schilling and his game studio are the only one I really felt sort of sorry for, and not all that much. Despite being glad he was feeding into my gamer habits, he should have had someone who wasn’t so in love with being in his circle that they could say “Are you sure you want to get in bed with the government? On a loan? For a Triple-A game release? Worth more than the studio itself?”

It also goes for the average person as well. How many people do you consider friends who honestly never give you an idea that is a good one? How often do you look up to find yourself dealing with personal fallout and you could have avoided it by listening to that friend who told you what you needed to hear but didn’t want to? Listening to the right person at the right time can lead to personal achievement goals being reached. The wrong info, from the yes men or women you left in your circle could leave you broke like the these guys.

Now I could be super cynical and say everyone needs a character like Louis Litt from Suits around, but let’s be realistic here. Everyone needs to take a breath and make an honest assessment of what they are about to do. Should I really spend $150 dollars on new gym clothes and a gym membership? Or should I just buy the gear and start doing things on my own before I take the leap? Should I toss more money at fixing my current money pit, heap of a car? Or should I go ahead and live a bit under my lifestyle and spend the money to get something that won’t break down every month like this one? I make 56k a year, should I live like it and have no chance for vacations and nights out? Or should I back it off a bit and live like I’m on a 35k budget and be able to drop everything for a weekend in Vegas?

I don’t pretend to know the answers for you personally. I am just a blogger after all. But every time Broke comes on I watch it. I watch it because I don’t want to have my personal success turn bad due to decisions I could have made otherwise. And because seriously, Andre RISON thought he could sing. That is event television people. Now if I could just get Zoe Saldana to hire me, I’d be able to work that Ruthless charm over some trial prep…lol maybe I’m the one dreaming too much.

–  THE Ruthless Wonder