So for once on a weekend(also read as when you are least paying attention), I want to tell a couple stories that lead to me going into online dating and thus the myriad of hilarious interactions I’ve had. We’ll save those for Ruthless On Relationships, but the background stories are apparently interesting to my friends. Starting with the tale of a woman we’ll call Jan, and we’ll also tell the story of a woman named Anne. Neither of these women’s real names will be used because HAHA! unnecessary drama. The stories are more important than they are really so work with me.
Jan’s story is fairly classic. I met her at a transistional point in my life. I wasn’t quite who I am now, but I wasn’t the pre Ruthless Revolution me either. She was striking. She has this look that is very intense, but it is so playful. It judged me, but said I defy my judgment at the same time. I bit, hard, for this woman. And as I am wont to do, my overly analytical brain start reminding me of the nightmare scenarios that could become of all this.
But I paid that notion no mind and asked her out. And for a little while. For a few months there honestly, it worked. Now it is important to note that at the time I asked her out and for all the dates we had to this point she and I never had to go to any major dress like high society events. We put on nice clothes and all, but really no one was in major stuff. I ended up invited to a stellar event that it was clear I was going to need to get the tux for. And I did. Got the hotel room as well because HA there would be so much drinking at the open bar I would be way too gone to go home.
So I’m not dressed up yet, but I’m going to pick her up. I knock, she opens the door and…I can’t really describe the nature of certain women in makeup. What I can articulate is that makeup on, in that dress, and with the sun shining in like…like a fucking spot light, I became fully aware I had not only gone way out of my league. I was giving the universe the middle finger and daring it ruin my life. Now this event would play out in similar fashion in law school. But having had this moment I was far better prepared. And me and Jan 3 months later would decide we had different trajectories(My Wanderlust + her desire to settledown = single again), but in that moment I can truly say I was stunned to pure silence. And that yes I want to see you without a bunch of makeup before I see you with a bunch of makeup ladies.
She was tall
I never got to date Anne. I wanted to. I was mentally in a healthy place. I was physically feeling better about myself. And as far as life choices go I was on my way. I met her at a party. Not one of mine. She was a couple years younger than me. But the thing that makes me still have her frame etched into my brain was that she didn’t saunter over in some dreamscape like moment. She just asked who I was, pointed out where the alcohol was, and at random points in the party talked about cool subjects for me. Writing, politics, movies, and we spent something on the order of an hour chatting about toonami cartoons. Life is strange.
There was someone else there who at times wanted my attention. But the way theywent about it made me dismissive. I can’t explain that here. but anyway I would run into Anne multiple times after that. And even now I see her at times on facebook and don’t really take time to talk to her. Why? I have very little to say these days. But also because I know me. And there is no real reason to entertain the idea of dating her when I know for a fact that distance is not something Your Ruthless Wonder wants to deal with. And at the time, if I am honest, I knew it would become an issue so I held back. I’m a villain not a monster people.
So why are Anne and Jan’s stories important? Well for a lot of reasons. One you can understand that they are important enough both for me to talk about, and for me to talk about without mentioning their names. They are so important that I’ve written of them. But thinking on the situations, and the similar ones to theirs that have occurred(law school was a funny and fun time) since and before them, are what always brings me back to dating. I may take my own path on things, but my eyes are open to my own faults and flaws. Indeed the reason this upcoming Ruthless on Relationships is going to be fun to let you all hear is because of how interesting the idea of my past is. So why wasn’t this in the piece itself? Because it doesn’t really have to do with the data, or the conclusions, or the point of that upcoming piece. Just some backstory. And yes I am aware I am not tall. Still have a thing for very tall women, and short women. Why? None of your business.
Not really about what you think this is about. Shade is, if I recall correctly the only theatrically released film from Merv Griffin. It came out in 2003 and for my money is a great watch. This is not one of those, “You had to see it in theaters” movies. In fact, I would even say finding it on netflix or Amazon and making it part of your lazy saturday or sunday would be enough. Is it good enough for a theater ticket? Sure, but unless you’ve got someone hell bent on showing old school retreads for a festival you’re likely out of luck.
I found shade one late night on TV when I was home from school staying at mom’s And for the first 4 times I watched it I never caught it right at the beginning. When I finally did, and got to see the extra bits of introduction that made the film’s actions occur, I found it even more enjoyable. The movie is interesting in the same way Boiler Room is. You have a very believable setup and the actors are all Not quite yets, has beens trying to make a comeback, or character actors you’ve seen in tons of things. Hell you get a Jamie Foxx that I think might have been fresh off of his show. And to cap it you get Stallone in a voice you can easily understand and oozing the cool in a way you don’t expect out of him.
This is a movie you watch to see a cool story. But realize that it could have happened in any city, in any country, and be told in any language. The focus is cards and hustling, but the style is old school Hollywood. The hustles are the kind of things that don’t really have time to get out of sorts. So you believe the moments when people get tricked. And you can see how each of the cons work after they happen. I’m going to give this movie a final praise. It is one of the few films I would love to write a sequel for. I don’t think most films need sequels, but this one is so rich for the possibility that I would love it. The Hustler didn’t need a sequel until you saw Scorcese do The Color Of Money. Shade is the same move. Stuart Townsend, Thandie Newton, Gabriel Byrne and Sly Stallone will get you in your seat to watch, but I promise no one lets you down in this. Go check it out. Here’s the trailer.
That’s it for me. Enjoy your weekend